Welcome back to another round of small-town dispatch drama, where the calls are real and the plot twists are wilder than a raccoon on Red Bull. In Call Log Diaries, we’ve got mysterious ponds, feral felines, and a whole lotta yelling—some of it at Elon Musk.
Buckle up, folks because you’re in for a insanely strange ride.
Limbs Out for a Cruise
A concerned caller requested a welfare check on a woman spotted in a small silver sedan—with limbs hanging out the window.
Look, some people hang fuzzy dice from their mirror, others dangle limbs out the window.
Maybe she just needed to air out her leg… or she’s secretly a mannequin on a weekend joyride.
Swamp Thing, But Make It Personal
A woman reported her black border collie was dragged into her pond by an unknown something. The dog hasn’t resurfaced, and she heard intense splashing.
That pond might have fewer frogs and more cryptids than we thought.
Quick, someone call the Discovery Channel—sounds like we’ve found Tahoe Tessie’s long lost cousin!
Dial “E” for Elon
A 911 caller phoned in to vent about Elon Musk and Tesla. They were kindly advised that tech rants don’t qualify as emergencies.
Ma’am, we agree Twitter’s gone downhill, but unless your Tesla locked you inside and forced you to listen to a Musk podcast, this ain’t a code red.
The Goat Left Behind
A report came in about an abandoned goat after its owners moved and apparently forgot one key detail: the GOAT.
Nothing says “we’re done here” like packing your whole house and just leaving behind Billy the Goat like he was a bad roommate.
Don’t worry buddy—we see you.
Catflation Hits Hard
Someone started feeding one cat. Now they’ve got four—including a pregnant one—just chillin’ on the porch like they own the place.
Ah yes, the ancient law of feline multiplication: feed one, inherit a colony. Congratulations, you’re now the mayor of Cat Town. Hope you like tuna bills and hair in your toothbrush.
Man Vs. Man
A shirtless man was seen yelling and banging on his own car. No one else around—just him, the Honda CRV, and his inner demons.
When your therapist says “have a conversation with yourself,” but you take it way too literally.
At least he’s got good mileage on both emotional outbursts and gas.
Another day, another batch of calls that prove reality has a better writer than any Netflix series. From mysterious swamp creatures to Karen’s ranting about Elon Musk, Nevada County never disappoints.
Disclaimer:
All calls were obtained from the Nevada County Sheriff’s Office call logs and are considered public records. Please note that any additional commentary reflects the author’s perspective and does not represent the views of the Nevada County Sheriff’s Office or its affiliates. This commentary aims to provide a lighthearted take on otherwise challenging situations and is not intended to harm, slander, or negatively impact anyone involved.
Nevada County Sheriff’s Office Call Logs
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